Crap Days

There's two reasons I'm here right now typing this blog.  One:  My university website is down so I can't keep hitting refresh on my grades waiting for my Visual Comm. grade to come up.  Two:  I had a crap day, and that usually gets me pretty chatty.  Luckily for you I'm not here to talk about how crap my day was.  I've actually found that bad days make me evaluate my life.. not in terms of how awful I think it is (although I used to be very guilty of that) but more about what I'm doing, where I'm hoping to head etc.

But first let me show you my massive bowl of salad that is now my dinner:

It's seriously as big as my head!   But salad makes me feel human and alive, when I start to feel rundown a salad is always there to pick me up.  Of course if I had never decided to try being a vegetarian I probably would have never picked up on it - the way that certain foods have an almost healing/positive effect.  I'm much more in touch with my body and really that's what this blog post is going to be about - how changes I've made have made me more in touch with different parts of myself.

I start off every year saying 'This is going to be the year of change'.. I can tell you it rarely is.  I mean sure I've always done little things, changing things I don't like, but this is the first year that I've looked at things that I've wanted to do for a long time and just started doing them.  I cut my hair all off because I wanted to (although I am growing it back now it was quite the experience in liberation), I am studying something I like, I took up being a vegetarian and a few other secret projects that I can't reveal to protect the innocent (and save my own butt).

What I've learnt the most so far though, is how much I'm becoming this person that I always wanted to be but never really saw myself being.  People that are close to me and have known me for long enough could tell you that I've changed a lot in the past two years.  It's like I've always needed to chase different focuses because I couldn't focus on myself, finally I think I've learnt how to keep most of the focus on myself.  I have gained a lot of confidence about myself and what I can do.  

Two years ago my best friend was counting down for her wedding; she was also trying to conceive their first child.  We (including her husband) were all 20 at the time,  and while they were committing to each other I was getting over a messy breakup and fumbling through a new relationship.  I didn't get where her head was at 2 years ago, because I obviously didn't believe in relationships lasting or that making plans ever got someone anywhere.  2 years later I think I have some idea of where her head was at, it's like this change of heart/mind that just hits you - and little (HA!) things like commitment, children and womanhood hits you like a ton of bricks.  Being a mum, being a wife once seemed like foreign (but eventual) concepts and now they're what everything is going towards.  I'm not saying that I expect them to happen right now, but I accept them as things that will happen for me and that I welcome wholeheartedly. 

In the meantime I'll research homeschooling (which I'd love to do!), read about what other women do with their children, cuddle Cameron (Rachel's 8-month old son), read about growing vegetables/fruits/herbs, find out how to raise chickens and ducks, learn to sew toys/clothes/blankets, collect wooden toys and books in fear that they'll for some reason stop producing them over time.  And yes I'll do my degree, even though I can never see myself in an office.. because I figure any skill is a good skill and all this stuff I am doing at university will surely come in handy in ways that I can't expect or predict.  I may even be able to do something entirely unique that will require all the great multimedia stuff I'm learning, may require creativity or writing or German hahaha.  

I guess the point I'm trying to get to is that even crap days are to be expected on this path I'm strolling along in life. And that over time they make me stronger, no matter how much I whinge or vent - there's a bigger side of me that is happy than a side of me that is sad - so I finally know that I'm winning against the negative little rain cloud.  I know everything will be great - that it already is pretty great and that I'm lucky to have so much opportunity and love in my life. :)

PS:  See how much I love that salad? :P

The Week That Was - 23 to 29 August

Wow, I have been soooo very busy this week.  Yet again I skipped class to do work (and possibly to have fun, but details details).  I had my first 'Intro to Visual Communication' assignment due on Friday and I think I did okay!  It was a 2 minute video pitch and I found it really odd that I was one of the only people I saw that actually picked up a video camera?  Apparently there was a loophole that as long as you used a video editing software you could use still images.  Some video project huh?

After my hand-in I treated myself to a grocery shop and a boost smoothie (picture above).  OMG banana buzz how I love thee :D  I also love the pasta bake I made with our new oven - ooooooh yeah!

So despite how busy I was it didn't stop me doing two things:
1. Oogling craft books.. found this great book about making felt toys.

 

DO WANT TO MAKE THESE! So cute :D
And 2:  Watching Scott Pilgrim Vs. The World with Patrick

This movie was seriously AWESOME!  Maybe it's cause I'm you know part of the generation of Nintendo and Sega at it's finest - but also exposed to the arcade games and Atari by my parents.  I just absolutely adore the stylistic choices in this movie, and the music/sound is freaking incredible.  I was seriously blown away the entire movie and I'm dying to see it again - watching it in cinema is quite the experience! (Note: Dear Boyfriend, stop reading here thanks! xx) FYI I think I have the biggest crush on Brandon Routh (he's the second last guy in that pic).  So freaking hot, plus the first time you see him he's playing a guitar!  Ignore that he's a jerk - he's practically my dream boyfriend.  Did I mention he's freaking hot?

(Note: Boyfriend can read from here onwards!! xx)

Last but only due to timelines (I did this today!), I've been starting work on my storyboard for film class.  

I'm working with this other guy, on a story about a kid trying to buy alcohol from a liquor store (he's underage) in a spaghetti western style - so lots of dramatic close ups and gunshot sounds lol.  Think the stand-off scene in The Good, The Bad and The Ugly; then you've got the right idea.  So today was background day!!

I put in that last picture so you can appreciate that I am literally working off tiny crappy little scribbles to make these.  Apparently the 2 years I spent doing interior design taught me something about scale and perspective drawings - yay!  These are just my drafts, so I can run something visual past my partner and then make the final pictures (that's why there's no people).  Also people aren't exactly my strength as you can see by my amazing stick people in the picture above.

And that wraps up this week!  Now to do some cleaning and dig out my neglected German book from my epic paperwork pile.  Eek! xx

Music - Tunes of the Moment

Wow two updates in a day?  Yeah I stayed home from Uni because I was tired and felt really sick this morning - For those keeping tabs on me it's OKAY I'm going to my compulsory lecture/tute tonight, so there.

So something a little different today - I've been really getting into the movie soundtracks of In the Mood for Love and (500) Days of Summer.  I thought I'd share my standout songs from the movies, that really stuck out to me.  They're completely different films so I'll explain them and their soundtracks individually (and yes there's links.. there's always links!).

In the Mood for Love is a film from Hong Kong made in 2000.  It's a really odd story with very little talking, with a lot of emphasis put into camera positioning and repeated sequences to establish the moods.  It's really one of those 'love or hate' films.. I have to admit when I was made to watch it for class I may have fallen asleep, plus I hate having to read subtitles.. but when I read the synopsis and realised the actual storyline I could see the charm.  Anyway what really struck me in this movie is the sweet little soundtrack.. I instantly recognised the kind of spanish love songs that my grandmother would listen to and fell in love at first listen.  Turns out it was actually Nat King Cole singing in spanish, which I never knew - I love his voice, it reminds me of christmas time because my mum has his carols always playing.
There's also some violin - which always scores with me.

Songs:
Quizas, Quizas, Quizas - Nat King Cole
Aquellos Ojos Verdes - Nat King Cole
Yumeji's Theme - Shigeru Umebayashi
Angkor Wat Theme
Te Quiero Dijiste - Nat King Cole

(500) Days of Summer is a 2009 film, a story of 'boy meets girl' but with twist.  I've yet to meet someone that watches this film and hates it.  Plus I have the biggest girl crush on Zooey Deschanel, she is just too cute (even if she does break Joseph Gordon-Levitt's heart in this film).  The real winner in this movie are the The Smiths who are grossly under-appreciated in my opinion.  I'll list some other songs in this movie that were just beautiful - within the movie and out.

Songs:

Us- Regina Spektor

There Is A Light That Never Goes Out - The Smiths

Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want - The Smiths

You Make My Dreams - Hall & Oates

Sweet Disposition - The Temper Trap

Hero - Regina Spektor

Enjoy! xx

My Crazy Craft Obsession

I have always wanted to be good at one craft thing.  My first blog was about knitting - which is one of the crafts that my mother is absolutely fantastic at - alas (Update!) I have to tell you my knitting adventure was a complete failure.  Thankfully my lovely mum is almost finished the scarf for Justin so he at least HAS one!

So I'm moving onto sewing and felt craft!  For as long as I can remember I've looked with utter confusion at the piles of fabrics; with complete wonder at clothes/toys/furnishings made by this contraption called a sewing machine.  Last Saturday I bit the bullet, stole my mum's sewing machine and hit the fabric stores/bookstores/craft blogs - here are the results!

My modest little fabric pile - augh I could have bought so much more!  Poor store assistants, I sucked them dry for information on the differences between the fabrics - but hell I spent enough!  The top three are all 100% cotton, I'm hoping to make a little quilt from the yellow ones and maybe a skirt from the red stripy one.   The pink fabric is for a secret project, so shhh.  I also got a teal one and a grey stretch blend to make dress pants.

My not-so-modest felt pile.  These are mixture of different felt materials.. I seem to have this love for the material, probably stemming back to making little toys with it when I was in primary school :3  It's so cheap and versatile; I'm particularly interested in making felt appliques to go onto things.  I'm already pretty handy with hand-sewing it's just the sewing machine I have to master!

I <3 Buttons so so so much!  I had to buy these cute mix packs, more buttons then you can poke a stick at!  Here we also see half of the pretty thread colours I bought to make my fabrics.

Finally, this is the book I bought from Borders.  It was fairly exxy @ $55 but it's one hell of a chunky book!  It goes into a lot of detail about different sewing techniques and is a really great starting point for a nubcake like me.  But in saying that there isn't much in it for exciting 'projects' which is why I want another half a dozen books already haha.

Ekka 2010

So I'm pretty sure the last time I went to the Ekka was when I was a teenager.. so maybe around 14 years old? Okay so lets say I went to the Ekka around 8 years ago.  For those not from Brisbane the Ekka is like a big city fair that lasts for a week every August.  We even get a day off (or two if you're still in school).

I couldn't remember anything about it, so I thought 'Okay this year, I'm going to do it!'.  I actually had a really great time (despite being all on my ownsome), there were heaps of areas to look at in most interest bases - my personal favourites were the animals, the cake decorating and the food stalls (yum!).

Epic Failure

So for the few of you who are actually following this - besides the 2 official followers (Hi by the way!) - you may have noticed that it's been about three weeks since I did my last post.  Those of you who know me, probably saw this coming.. but seriously heaps has happened since my last mind-blowing post and I will be updating soon!!

With this announcement comes the change of my byline from 'aiming for daily snaps a day' to 'aiming for weekly stories'.  Because that's really all I have at the end of a week - a bunch of random stories and happenings, but I do hope to be able to at least up date twice a week.  Also I'll be taking my day numbers off and just leaving the titles.

Okay off to have some Sunday brunch and then massive update when I get back!
xx

PS: Okay now that I've had a look it's actually been a month.. eek!

The Dumps

I am literally in them.

I actually stayed in my bed today until about 2:30pm.. until one of my friends convinced me to go the hell out somewhere.  So I did.. I drove two hours to eat Italian and drove two hours back.  Granted it was the best spinach ricotta of my life, but if I know me at all (which I kind of do sometimes) I know that exaggerating actions are almost certainly a sign that I'm not doing so great.

That and wearing heels of the beach has to be a sign of madness.

But at least it was a great view.

Peppermint Epiphany

The tea that started it all :P

Just elaborating on my facebook status here: "This is going to sound retarded.. but as I was eating my toast this morning with peppermint tea I realised that I have a personality and that I had this person in me that I'd completely forgotten over time.. Go me?".

In a nutshell without knowing me, I'm going to start by saying that the past couple of years have been difficult emotionally.  Even though I've gained many great things, like a wonderful boyfriend of nearly two years and my lovely rattikin trio,  I have to admit that I've felt really aloof with what kind of person I am (or even what kind of person I'd like to be).  I used to have a really strong identity.. I felt like I was the kind of person that could be friends with anyone and I used my social skills to the max.  Then for certain reasons I started to doubt myself.  Doubt turned into pushing away and secluding.  Eventually that doubt become massive social anxiety - the thought of doing anything with strangers, even friends was so emotionally crushing that I would be in hysterics before it and completely drained after it.  And I'd always think I'd made a fool of myself.  I think most people mistook this as being quiet, but it was more that I was afraid of everything to do with social situations.

When Justin said he was going away for 6-8 weeks, I thought I'd be stuffed.  I've left myself in this position of not having very much to do with myself and sans many friends, so the thought of being alone for that long was a really scary one.  But I really wanted to be strong.  So what did I discover this morning over a cup of peppermint tea?  I realised that I own myself.  That all along I had all these unique wants and likes, that I have things that I'm proud of - that I'm great at.  I've been so afraid of who I am this whole time that I tried to make myself about certain things that I could cling onto, that I forgot all the things that made me.. well ME.  And those things I've been clinging onto?  I don't resent them at all, in fact they've only made me feel stronger about what I've hung onto desperately to get through the rainy days.  And now - I'm just super excited :)  There's sooo much to do, I'm sure the next few weeks are absolutely going to fly. xx

Back to Work!

In a past life (as in six months ago) before I started my professional student life, I used to work in a balloon shop near my house.  A balloon shop?  Yeah.. basically we specialise in making anything out of balloons - sculptures, bouquets, columns, arches, balloon drops - you name it we probably do it.  It's actually a really crazy job.. my favourite thing to do is bouquets - I love designing and choosing things to go together and then decorating to the max.  To be honest (and I can say this in hindsight) I really loved my job, but I was going through a tough period and it made everything bad.. that's why I left.. but now I'm back and I get a lot of free rein with what I do with my (few) days there.

So the highlight of today for me was making a Green Thumb bouquet and matching gift wine:

So this is the bouquet altogether.

Close up of the watering can.

The wine bottle I decorated to go with the bouquet, I thought the flower on top was really cute :D

Dad's Birthday

Today it was my dad's birthday.  In typical fashion my mum gave him the same ol' gift of Baileys, except this year she gave him two.  For some reason she thought it was a hilarious idea to wrap them both differently and then died of laughter when he asked which one he should open first.  Sigh, my mum..

We went up to Mt. Tamborine which is about half hour from my parents house and had a look around the gallery walk (which is a street full of little shops at the top of the mountain).  My favourite store is the German Cuckoo Clock store.  I went to Germany when I was 16 and pretty much love anything to do with the country - I am totally dirty that I never got to see the cuckoo clock place in the Black Forest.. one day.  I also love clocks, because my granddad was a watchmaker and I have very fond memories of all the amazing clocks that he used to make and fix.. he had so many around his house that every time I see a clock I think of him.  Here's a pic of one wall of the cuckoo clock place, so you have some idea of how jam packed this place is with clocks:

We were meant to have lunch, but we actually ended up getting up there too late for lunch and too early for dinner.. so instead we went for a walk at Curtis Falls.

What I really like about the walks at Mt Tamborine is that there's a real rainforest feel to them, with occasional bits and pieces of normal Australian bush.  The waterfall was beautiful, not flowing very much because of the lack of rainfall.  There's lots of birds in there too, you can always hear them chirping away and some random turkeys that go skittering in front of you as you walk along haha.  Definitely one of my favourite places in Qld.

Bath time!

I love a good bath.. it kills me that back home we don't have a bathtub, so when I visit my parents (particularly when it's a little on the cool side!) I looooove to have baths.  I've been feeling pretty down and crumby lately, so it was really great to just chill and loosen up a little.  I mean there's bubbles - they make everything alright ;)

Lots of bubbles at that!  And Miss Rubber Ducky decided she wanted a piece of that action!

Ripley's and Timezone

The last time that I went to Ripley's on the Gold Coast was probably about 12-14 years ago.  I didn't remember anything about the place, but I did know that I thought it was the bomb-diggity.  Fast forward to 2010, Ripley's have spent about six months redoing the entire place because of the new construction going on around it.  I've been dying to go since they reopened in February, so I firmly persisted with my friend Patrick until he agreed to come check out the place (He'd never been so he was the perfect candidate, plus I may have bribed him by promising a visit to the massive Timezone there lol).  Behold some highlights from Ripley's!

Badass Shrunken Head.  It's like seriously the size of a computer mouse or something.

This is a tiny painting, with Pat standing in as my comparison!

An amazing sculpture of Dame Edna made entirely of chicken wire.  The detail on the glasses is great.

This wedding dress is made entirely out of toilet paper!  Patrick joked that I had found my dream dress - I can guarantee for those taking note that I wouldn't be caught dead with pink on my dream dress :P

Pat on the dodgem cars.  I don't think I've seen him more happy than when he realised Timezone had dodgem cars lol!  Had to take a photo of this momentous occasion.

Me at the wheel of a dodgem car.. yes I was aiming for a cheesy photo haha!  I actually drove these surprisingly well, if only dodgem cars were the norm on our roads.

Patrick lining up the shot for the final hole on 18-hole putt putt.  This is a tricky shot because of the slope before the hole.  It was a really up and down game and we actually ended up tying at 52 points each.

I am such a student..

...when I get uber-excited about buying a backpack.  I decided it was time to bid my messenger bag farewell for going to uni, because sweet mercy it was killing my shoulders and spine.  So sensible backpack it is.  I'd been eyeing off one on ebay for about a week, it was purrrfect (lined fleece section for my laptop and everything!) however it was a love affair that was never to be... since I lost hard in the auction yesterday :(

Perhaps in a bid to make up for my feelings of rejection and depressing in the wake of losing my one true love, I headed out today with the sole mission of finding 'The Next Best Thing'.  Finally I found this little cutie - half price!

Movies - Twilight 3: Eclipse

Lol anyone actually reading this is going to start thinking that all I do is read books and go to movies!  Last night it was TY3, today L&G I bring you the lowdown on Eclipse - book 3 of the Twilight Saga...

Rachel asked me to go see it with her today and I was like HELLS YES!  Despite the fact that I was on like 5 hours sleep, mostly delirious and flying high on V juice.  Despite the fact that there were 1000's of teenagers encircling the movie cinema foyer - my butt was on that seat faster.. than two minute noodles my friend.

"Face it - I am hotter than you" - Yes Jacob, we know it!

Going in I seriously forgot the entire plot of the third book.  I kept thinking of the fourth book watching the whole time and then wondered why none of the stuff I thought was going to happen actually happened.  So don't ask me about accuracy here, I'm assuming most of it was there cause I haven't heard the twi-hards crying too loudly on the internets.

Bella, one day when you grow up you'll realise it's actually a lot harder to get a guy to propose to you a thousand times than it is to get in his pants - priorities girlfriend priorities!!  (Oh and tell him to fire his stylist.. he looks like Wolverine).

Look comparing it to the previous two movies, I think this one had way more effort put into it.  Different director I think?  I'm not sure how easy it is for a non-twilight reader to understand.. it did seem to chop around a bit.. but it's pretty good, they can actually act to save their lives and the right balance of drama/romance/comedy/action is there.  Thumbs up from me, I look forward to watching this one with a glass of vodka and crying at how unfair it is that Bella has the ultimate romantic and the ultimate sex on leg's chasing after her despite being a plain and boring character.  Life's tough bro.

Movies - Toy Story 3

A few weeks ago I saw a Facebook page named along the lines of 'Move out of the way kid, I've been waiting (x) amount of years for the 3rd Toy Story!'.  So freaking true!  I loved the first two as.. well a young teen I'm thinking?  Rex and Slinky were my fav fav's.. because slinky's are freaking cool and so are dinosaurs!!

Number three was really really great.  I love what Pixar do with there story lines and I really am glad that they haven't cheapened this franchise - all three of these movies are equally amazing and wonderful in their own right.  Now in the spirit I won't spoil anything (mostly because my boyfriend will have my head), but please if you haven't seen it yet - GO SEE IT!  And if you get a bit teary at the end it's okay.. my mum cried :P

In other news my other half is boarding a plane to Bangkok right now.. he's off to London for an unspecified amount of time.  So on one hand I'll probably have more to write about in an attempt to get a life.. on the other hand it's probably going to be pretty obvious I'm compensating for something.

Books - Open: Andre Agassi's Biography

I started reading this book a few weeks ago before we left for Hamilton Island.  My Justin is a big tennis fan, before I met him I didn't even understand how the game worked let alone who the main players were.  So when he urged me to read the biography, I didn't honestly think I'd enjoy it very much.  Now that I've finished it, I can't tell you that I like tennis more than when I began, but I did enjoy it for what it was - another person's life.   It was particularly interesting because of Agassi's confession of hating the game that brought him so much fame, success and even love with his wife of 9 years, Steffi Graf.

He was the american saviour of tennis in his heyday.  The chicks loved him and the guys wanted to be him.  I can't believe he seriously got around with a mullet back in the day but there's the 90's for you I guess.  Most of all it's crazy how important this signature look was to him, since it wasn't even his own natural hair!  I think the best thing he got out of his relationship with Brooke Shields was her suggestion to shave that atrocity off and get rid of the guise.  Which of course brings me to my next point about the book - the Nikon ad that allowed the press to slaughter his character because of one catch phrase not even created by Agassi but written into a script by the company - 'Image is Everything'.  Watch the ad here.

I also found this interview by 60 minutes in America interesting, he seems to me to be a very genuine and likeable person.  I think most people can relate to not being happy with what we've got in life, I don't think that just because someone is rich that it doesn't give them the right to lament their lack of choice in life.  I also like that Agassi has given back a lot, reading about his education foundation and prep school was really interesting, given his lack of being able to have a proper education.

Passing Time - Boggle

Juz and I looove playing Boggle, it's the latest obsession.  I like to think I'm the Boggle Queen.  Probably cause I bet Sir Justin in 9/10 matches haha.  I've always really been into any kind of word game (except Scrabble augh) because I'm a bit of a reader and I think I have a pretty sweet vocabulary.  Sometimes I totally see words in spanish and german in there too, but I'm not allowed to write them :P

The highest score I've gotten playing with Justin is 54 points I think.. it's because he keeps looking for made up words hoping he'll catch me out (we have a dictionary, but it almost makes it worse because of the amount of ridiculous words that DO exist).  Meanwhile I pull out long words and get 2-3 points more per word.  There's strategy to it :P